Monthly Archives: November 2015

Ego and not looking yourself up!

Looking yourself up on the internet is never a good thing! I was trying to see how accessible this particular website is, and so I typed in the web address……and up it came, along with my blogs. However, I noticed someone had mentioned me on a different site, in a complimentary way……as in I was the one who had ‘best read 2014’ for her. So I had a look. And it seems someone else said I was crazy, and that I went on about free will……and other less than complimentary stuff, most of which I didn’t understand. I think they were talking about me, anyway….it wasn’t clear. Anyway, I quickly closed the page and berated my ego for leading me there in the first place!

I love the internet….I love Youtube, a classroom full of teachers and information, all free of charge, but I did start reading some of the comments below some of my most enjoyed vids……and was shocked by the collection of unreasonable and/or irrelevant responses! I don’t read the comments anymore……they take all the joy out of learning something interesting!

I think I may start a site that names clients, separating them into catagories such as ‘good’, ‘acceptable’ or ‘rubbish’……and then consultants can check the  list before accepting a booking …..(I am of course only joking!). Having said that, such a site probably already exists, somewhere out there! Must look it up…….

I suppose that readily given, personally insulting, detrimental opinions have always existed, even pre – internet, and that lack of research, personal experience or relevant education has never prevented them being bandied about as absolute fact. It can be kind of enertaining though, in an uncomfortable, weirdly fascinating way, unless of course YOU are the focus of attention……and then you just have to IGNORE THEM (the advice we give to others whose feelings have been hurt!), those invisible, unreachable destroyers of self – esteem, self – belief and general ego!

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Particles, worm holes and intuitive insights……it all sounds crazy!

So……the belief that human beings have the capacity to ‘see’ things that have not yet occurred is ridiculous, but the idea of a multi – verse and worm holes, and a tiny particle that can suddenly create a bubble that could move across the universe at the speed of light, systematically wiping it out, is NOT. Isn’t science wonderful!

Actually, I love the theory that our universe came into being as the result of two universes merging, OR one universe splitting apart, and I love the thought that a short cut between our universe and another, a worm hole, may actually exist. And hearing scientists explain this stuff is like listening to a far fetched sci – fi story that keeps us on the edge of our seats………but we take it as fact, and on trust, and don’t dispute it because it is SCIENCE. Smart men and women have spent years figuring this stuff out, and years searching for the tiny wee particle that could potentially, and without warning, bring about the end of EVERYTHING…..our entire universe! Of course they didn’t know that until they discovered it……why, you meddlesome brain – boxes!

But yet the idea that we have the capacity to ‘read’ other human beings, that we can pick up information, past, present and/or future, about and for people we haven’t previously met or can’t even see (they may be at the other end of a telephone line or communicating via the internet), is still preposterous to many, many people. And the claim that human consciousness continues to function beyond physical death elicits an almost pathalogical response from some people! The phrase ” I am too scientifically minded to believe in anything I can’t see” would never be uttered by a scientist, surely……….scientists have to have huge imaginations, they have to be able to visualise the possibility of what they suspect exists, long before they ever get to lay eyes upon it……if indeed it IS even possible to lay eyes on whatever it is they discover.

So, if we can scientifically accept that there are between 10 and 26 different dimensions, why is it so hard to get our heads around human intuitive ability? I KNOW that it is possible to predict parts of the future(s)………..because I have successfully done so many, many times, and not just with routine, everyday stuff. And I say futures, because there is always more than one available to us……..tomorrow is always built upon today, and we get the chance to change the course of our own destiny on a daily basis! The purpose of an intuitive consultation is to gain insight……to gather information, so that we can take more control of the shape and form of our own future. There is nothing spooky about that! Knowledge is power, but ONLY IF it is understood and utilised……..and that, my friends, is not rocket science!

THE GALLOPING ‘PSYCHIC’ ROAD SHOW……..WHERE IT ALL WENT WRONG!

Very little invites as much debate, much of which is extremely heated, than the subject of ‘psychics’! I have recently been researching mediums and psychics online, and even though I myself have been on the receiving end of periodic vitriolic rantings, I was still surprised by the amount of anger expressed towards those involved in the world of metaphysics.

But you know, I can accept that some of that anger is not actually misplaced. There are individuals out there who are being paid vast amounts of money (though in fairness most non – celeb ‘readers’ are never getting rich anytime soon) but who are not actually producing consistent quality results, despite the hype and hysteria. And hype and hysteria are very powerful tools in the money generating world of television. Periodic ‘hits’, ‘leading’ questions, making things ‘fit’, talking very quickly to brush over inconsistencies…… I saw this, time and time again, especially with the high profile mediums……but yet the audience members and tv presenters appeared to be oblivious. Sometimes I was kind of impressed, but too often I felt embarrassed! And I was disappointed. I could see that my own line of work was fraught with misrepresentation and inconsistencies, and that in some cases it was downright  wrong…..dangerous even. 

Don’t misunderstand me. I have absolute faith in my work, in the power and capacity of the human mind. And despite the sneers of the ‘too – scientific – to – believe’ fraternity, there is an abundance of quality evidence to suggest that human consciousness continues to function beyond physical death. I have no issue with that. But I believe the problem began with the dawn of show biz psychics and mediums. It started off pretty well, but eventually more and more was demanded, more and more was expected……..more than could be reasonably delivered. Hype was necessary to keep the show on the road, to keep the people coming, to keep the money rolling in. Accusations of cheating started to sour the proceedings, but that did not deter those who wanted to believe that their deceased loved ones were still within reach…..if that celeb medium was proved to be a cheater, it could cast doubt on the whole industry, on the reality of life after death. That would be too difficult to accept. The dawn of the show biz psychic also brought a swarm of ‘gifted’ mystics out of the woodwork, looking for attention and glory. The introduction of the internet allowed this swarm to become a plague, and the genuinely able and efficient intuitives became outnumbered, lost in the melee, and were ultimately tarred wih the same brush. So it has all become a bit of a mess, with as many haters as devotees.

This is where I personally stand:

It IS possible for human beings to ‘read’ one another. It is not a gift, but an ability. Some have a more finely tuned ability than others, but it can developed, dependent upon certain factors.

Psychic and intuitive are not the same. It is possible for someone to give psychic observations/predictions without being particularly intuitive. For example, saying something like “You will look at a house with a blue front door and a broken step” is a psychic observation. It may or may not come to pass, and it is interesting (at least it is if it does come to pass), but it is not life changing. There is a huge market for this kind of service, and is generally what most people think metaphysical work is all about. 

Intuitive consutations take a bigger picture into account, based upon the client’s current mental and emotional positioning in life, which is understood through the intuitive ‘reading’ of his/her energy (we all know about ‘energy’……it is that intangible thing we feel, such as meeting someone and immediately knowing whether or not we relate to them, or walking into a building and feeling comfortable or uncomfortable, for no obvious reason). The different potential ‘future’ pathways are outlined……as in “If you adopt this mindset/act in this way, this is the way things will unfold. If this is not what you want, you will need to change your mindset, and take a different set of actions…..and this is how things will unfold”. Predictions will be offered, but often with explanations, or conditions attached. Inuitive consultations are for insight, foresight and even warnings, and are always about the choices the client will be presented with in his/her search for fulfillment and a meaningful, satisfying life.

Not all those who work under the title ‘psychic’ are particularly intuitive.Some are, some aren’t. An intuitive consultant would be unlikely to describe their ability as being a gift, for two main reasons: they realize that everyone was born (or evolved) with intuitive capacity, which probably comes as part of our fight – or – flight programming; and, they have worked incredibly hard to develop their own mind, to learn about human emotions, behaviour and psychology, and are generally fascinated and touched by everything around them……they feel a connection to something bigger, and are driven to ask questions, and to allow the answers to take shape and form, in different ways.

No – one can see everything that has been, is, or will be. Many of us can see some of it, and some will see stuff others can’t, and vice versa. But there is always more than one potential future, although there will be certain occurences that we have had no obvious part in creating (some would now bring up the ‘law of attraction!)……and then we get to choose how we respond to those occurances.

The whole of our physical universe is made up of opposites: matter and anti matter, physics and metaphysics, birth and death, male and female, hot and cold, up and down…..you get the picture. We are supposed to use both aspects of our mind, intuitive and rational, as we manoevre our way through life. Those who believe science has ALL the answers are as wrong as those who believe that spirituality/mysticism is the end – all of everything. The two, working together, are as powerful as it can ever become. There IS a place for intuitive work in this modern, progressive world, so move over a bit science, and stop being such an arrogant bully, hogging the whole bed! But there is less of a healthy or viable place for the stuff that has been packaged as ‘psychic and spiritual’, in a media driven, brittle, competitive way.  Well, that’s what I think, anyway!

   

Romantic love and money……..gimme connection!

Relationships, work/money, health and family! These are the areas of life that concern my customers the most, with relationships and love definitely topping the list! Work and money……..or expressed in a different way, SECURITY…….is the next biggie.

But you know, the two are kind of tied together. The need, the desire for security, is huge for most people. Love and money both offer the idea of security, emotionally and materially speaking. But it all has to start with the idea of love. So, we say we are looking for love, but in reality we aren’t; we are actually looking for connection, to feel as if we belong, and to feel safe. Love and money both offer the promise of security………which is just another word for safety. Romantic love is an idealistic notion, and romance IS wonderful, but it doesn’t actually carry any real weight, doesn’t have any real substance…..it is just a naughty little honeytrap! You see, we need to be lured into a physical relationship, because the continuance of the human race depends upon people getting together……literally CONNECTING……..sexually. But we also seek out emotional connection. Purely sexual connection is absolutely possible, and it can be fun, but it cannot fulfill the deeper human need. So how does money tie in with this? Well, as stated, money, like love, offers the promise of safety, and also like love, challenges us HUGELY, emotionally speaking! They are both about relationship…….developing a connection. In love, the desire for connection is massive…..so many of my customers use the word when talking about someone he/she met; “I felt a connection”, or “I really thought we had a connection”. Problems arise when one person ‘feels’ a connection with another, but it isn’t reciprocated. Or it is, but he/she panics, afraid of what the feeling of connection will lead to, and disappears in a cloud of dust. The loss of an actual or perceived connection can be devastating, causing us to doubt our own judgement, to feel rejected, and even afraid to put ourself through that again. It is the same with money. We need to feel a connection with it, to develop a meaningful relationship, and this is SOOOO hard for many, many people! Infact, there will be those out there who completely disagree with me, which is absolutely fine……however, it won’t cause me to change my observation! Money, like romantic love, was woven into the fabric of the developing human story, to challenge us at an emotional and psychological, and yes, even spiritual level! I could write a whole book about the relationship human beings have or don’t have with money, and how it impacts upon our thoughts, beliefs and attitudes……it is one heck of a fascinating minefield! As is romantic love. Imagine how good life would be if we had a genuinely connected relationship with a partner AND with money/abundance! Both require deeper understanding than many of us realise. Romantic love can lead us to ‘real’ love, something that takes time, patience, tolerance, experience, compromise, a willingness to grow, and an independent mindset (not making our partner too responsible for our moods and happiness). It can lead us to that satisfying place of sometimes not liking, but always loving, our partner……a genuine, well – earned connection! And as one who has struggled with a dysfunctional relationship with money for much of her life, largely due to childhood programming, I can tell you it isn’t too much different than the struggle with romantic love! A healthy relationship with both leads to the sense of security we all crave, and frees us off to live and create and grow. Security is a state of mind, rather than a factor entirely dependent upon outside sources…..and we can all develop that state of mind, with an understanding and acceptance of our own emotional and psychological nature!      

Finding closure!

Imagine if we kept the heaviest of our old bags of rubbish, and carried them around with us wherever we went? And what if we used those sacks of waste like sand bags, to create a barrier around ourselves? Wouldn’t life begin to ‘stink’ and wouldn’t we become limited in how far and fast we could travel? And what if we met others who were doing the same……how genuinely close could we become, with all that none – recycled, partially decomposed jumble between us?

It sounds awful, doesn’t it? If you witnessed such a person you would absolutely want to save them from such a fate, would want to convince them that they don’t have to live that way……..wouldn’t you? But what if you realized you were, infact, gazing into a mirror, and it was yourself you were seeing? Would you be as appalled, would you feel as concerned for yourself as you would for another? Or would you turn away from the reflection, treating it as mental and emotional landfill, burying the image deep within the abyss of your unconscious mind? Out of sight but still taking up space somewhere, and still seeping into the atmosphere.

You see, most of us are more than willing to help others deal with their baggage, but are lousy at feeling worthy enough to help ourselves. We believe we should be stronger, ‘OVER all that stuff’, that we should be ‘getting on with things’. So we push the bags of rubbish down, mentally close the hatch, and then stand on it with our full weight. Try and get out NOW, I dare you, we yell in a silent whisper. I absolutely dare you.

Then this is what happens. We ask questions, the same ones, over and over again.

“Why did my ex treat me the way he/she did?”
“Why did my mother clearly favour my sister/brother over me?”
“Why did my father leave when I was a child, and why hasn’t he kept in touch?”
“Why didn’t my mother ever say she was proud of me, or that she loved me?”
“Why does everyone let me down?”

Why, why, why, why, why? I need answers, I just want closure, I HAVE dealt with all of this……..I am only mentioning it because I am curious…….yes, honestly! None of it bothers me anymore……but still, I would like to be given an explanation………I want CLOSURE!

The problem is, the above questions, and others of a similar nature, are not closure questions. They are ‘I am still in pain’ questions. And there is nothing wrong with that……it is okay to feel hurt by other people’s unreasonable or non – supportive behaviour. It is just that if we genuinely want to be more free, if we want to feel more in control of our own future, if we want to be happier, we have to accept – YES, accept! – certain facts:

The person who has hurt you is never going to be able to come up with an explanation that would make everything all right. What is it you would actually accept from him or her? “I am a complete waste of time as a partner/parent, my behaviour was appalling, I didn’t deserve you, and I will never forgive myself. You were right, I was wrong, and I really don’t know what got into me. Please forgive me for my unacceptable behaviour”? You may possibly receive a partial or watered down version of the above, but it is unlikely that the one who hurt you will have the awareness or the courage to accept much or all of the responsibility……..many, many people struggle to see themselves as wrong – doers, because it is too emotionally painful to deal with. And so they hide behind defensiveness and blame. And if they do make an effort to apologise, it often includes a ‘yes but’……”I am sorry BUT……” followed by reasons for their behaviour, and/or a list of your own failings. People can behave really badly. Just because someone conceives and produces a child doesn’t mean that he/she has the capacity or interest in being a mature, loving parent. Just because someone enters into a romantic relationship doesn’t mean he/she doesn’t have excess baggage and an attitude problem. When I say the only way forward is to accept, I don’t mean you should allow everyone and anyone to mentally, emotionally or physically abuse you. I mean that the only way to free yourself off is to stop asking WHY?? When you know you have given your best, when you have done all you can, make peace with the fact that someone you had faith in, someone you offered your heart and mind and love to, was in such a messed – up place that they were unable to value that precious gift, and that their behaviour was a reflection of their own inner world. And actually had nothing to do with you. And then choose. Continue to associate with them whilst genuinely accepting them for who and what they are, or completely remove yourself from them. Either way, you still have to heal the need for closure through the WHY?? mindset, otherwise you will remain caught up in the pain and feelings of rejection. Removing yourself physically whilst remaining mentally and emotionally connected to the ‘wrong’ will be a waste of time. And you will be doing all of this for you, your own healthy future and your own happiness!