Romantic love and money……..gimme connection!

Relationships, work/money, health and family! These are the areas of life that concern my customers the most, with relationships and love definitely topping the list! Work and money……..or expressed in a different way, SECURITY…….is the next biggie.

But you know, the two are kind of tied together. The need, the desire for security, is huge for most people. Love and money both offer the idea of security, emotionally and materially speaking. But it all has to start with the idea of love. So, we say we are looking for love, but in reality we aren’t; we are actually looking for connection, to feel as if we belong, and to feel safe. Love and money both offer the promise of security………which is just another word for safety. Romantic love is an idealistic notion, and romance IS wonderful, but it doesn’t actually carry any real weight, doesn’t have any real substance…..it is just a naughty little honeytrap! You see, we need to be lured into a physical relationship, because the continuance of the human race depends upon people getting together……literally CONNECTING……..sexually. But we also seek out emotional connection. Purely sexual connection is absolutely possible, and it can be fun, but it cannot fulfill the deeper human need. So how does money tie in with this? Well, as stated, money, like love, offers the promise of safety, and also like love, challenges us HUGELY, emotionally speaking! They are both about relationship…….developing a connection. In love, the desire for connection is massive…..so many of my customers use the word when talking about someone he/she met; “I felt a connection”, or “I really thought we had a connection”. Problems arise when one person ‘feels’ a connection with another, but it isn’t reciprocated. Or it is, but he/she panics, afraid of what the feeling of connection will lead to, and disappears in a cloud of dust. The loss of an actual or perceived connection can be devastating, causing us to doubt our own judgement, to feel rejected, and even afraid to put ourself through that again. It is the same with money. We need to feel a connection with it, to develop a meaningful relationship, and this is SOOOO hard for many, many people! Infact, there will be those out there who completely disagree with me, which is absolutely fine……however, it won’t cause me to change my observation! Money, like romantic love, was woven into the fabric of the developing human story, to challenge us at an emotional and psychological, and yes, even spiritual level! I could write a whole book about the relationship human beings have or don’t have with money, and how it impacts upon our thoughts, beliefs and attitudes……it is one heck of a fascinating minefield! As is romantic love. Imagine how good life would be if we had a genuinely connected relationship with a partner AND with money/abundance! Both require deeper understanding than many of us realise. Romantic love can lead us to ‘real’ love, something that takes time, patience, tolerance, experience, compromise, a willingness to grow, and an independent mindset (not making our partner too responsible for our moods and happiness). It can lead us to that satisfying place of sometimes not liking, but always loving, our partner……a genuine, well – earned connection! And as one who has struggled with a dysfunctional relationship with money for much of her life, largely due to childhood programming, I can tell you it isn’t too much different than the struggle with romantic love! A healthy relationship with both leads to the sense of security we all crave, and frees us off to live and create and grow. Security is a state of mind, rather than a factor entirely dependent upon outside sources…..and we can all develop that state of mind, with an understanding and acceptance of our own emotional and psychological nature!      

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