How do we get unstuck?
You know, when we have dreams, ideas, hopes…and a hundred reasons we can’t make them real? Such as….
I can’t just go off and do what I want to…I have to live in the REAL world.
You don’t have to just ‘go off’. The real world will be wherever you go, anyway, whether you do what you want to or not. Because it is YOUR real world, and it always will be. You might, overtime, change your version of what constitutes your real world, but it will still be YOUR real world!
I don’t have enough confidence to do the things I want to.
Of course you don’t. You can only feel confident when doing the things you already know how to do, because you have already done them a zillion times. That’s the way it is, for all of us.
I have to have security, so I can’t take any chances.
You are taking a chance every second of every day, and if you are reading this, you have obviously survived, and are clearly still in the game. People die in their beds, in their cars, on the street, at work, in the pub, on the beach, at the store….whilst walking, running, swimming, dancing…breathing, even. Security doesn’t exist in the outside world. It is an inside job for every last one of us. Starting a new job? Well, they ARE paying you, so no loss of security there. Starting a little business? Well, keep doing what you do to earn a living, until you no longer need to, for as long as it takes. Want to learn some new skills? Educate yourself, for free, through books and the internet, until you are able to pay for training that leads to a qualification…if necessary. Many, many successful people have no formal qualifications, and are entirely self – taught.
I don’t have time to do anything other than what I am already doing.
Well, that won’t be true forever, even if it IS true now (which, in most cases, it won’t be entirely). Children grow up. Circumstances change. Start with 5 minutes a day now….in another year/decade that 5 minutes will become an hour, a day, a week…a lifetime.
I don’t know enough about what I want to do, to be able to do it.
Who does? Apart, obviously, from people like brain surgeons. If we all waited to know everything there is to know about anything at all, we’d never start anything at all, ever. We wouldn’t have children, for a start off, or buy a house, never mind start a business or write a book, or bake and ice a wedding cake, or make a dress, or renovate our home, or make – over the garden.
I want to write/paint/cook/sew/heal etc, but I could never make a living at it.
So don’t make a living at it. Just do it. There is this weird belief (tied up with the security thing) that unless something makes money, we can’t do it, or it isn’t worth doing. And anyway, more successful businesses started as hobbies than didn’t. If you want to do something, it is better to dedicate an hour a week to it, than to put it on the shelf labelled “What’s the point?” and leave it there.
The thing is, I don’t like the idea of failing.
Neither do I, but I have done so, many times, and I am still here and in the swim. You aren’t made out of cut glass….you won’t shatter into a billion pieces because you mess up, or because some moron ‘hates’ you on the internet, or some people don’t get what you are trying to do, or your loved ones think you are crazy or wasting your time. You fail every day, to be honest. Fail to make a decent cup of tea, to arrive on time, to pay a bill, to be honest with someone about something, to be reasonable, to be resourceful with your time….and yet, here you still are!
And don’t forget, if you need some honest to goodness insight and guidance, you know where I am…..